I work at a major retail chain restocking shelves in the middle of the night. The store is open 24/7 and there is almost no end to the parade of ridiculous folks who seem to have some type of need to be out and about at 3 in the morning.
I'm used to people at this point.
But this was too much.
A chunky, beastly, toothless (or toothless enough to not make a difference) woman and her two equally appealing daughters were shopping down the aisle I'm trapped in for 8 hours a day. I pointedly ignored them as I am wont to do since the "Ten Foot Rule" (smile and greet customers when they get within 10 feet of you) stresses me out. Anyway, as this lady turns around I notice some type of tattoos on the back of her neck-
At least that's what they should have been. In reality she turned around and there was this-
Staring out at me from under a roll of blubber that threatened to overtake this woman's neck were two angry little eyes. I froze like a deer in the headlights, caught in the gaze of the Angry Neck.
Why was her neck so angry? It looked out on the world as if to say,
"Dammit, I'm trapped on the back of this woman and I am PISSED. All I have to look forward to is looking down at this fat bitches' blubbery ass all day long! You! Staring at me from down the aisle! I see you!"
But I don't know, maybe she had a tattoo of a nose and mouth elsewhere on her body to round out the whole package.
